The Power of a Family

My Grandma passed away last week. It was expected but still very sad. I was by her side when she passed and I was there when most of her children stood over her for the last time. They told her what a great job she had done and how beautiful she still was. They each took their own moments to deal with the reality they knew was coming. And then they bonded in action to move forward. So much to do but so many people there to get it done. Arrangements made, errands divided, and plans in place, they were able to leave the hospital together and breathe a sad sigh of relief that Grandma was finally with Tommy and Grandpa. (Grandpa had been waiting for so long!)

The following days were so . . . unique. When someone passes you are stopped in your tracks; stunted by thoughts of them; reminded by their presence in unexpected ways. But you still move forward. We laughed and hugged and smiled and cried and experienced so many things over a short period of time. It's exhausting but not altogether unbearable.

Excited to be together once again, but saddened by the reason for it, my very large family has reached out by phone and e-mail and text. "I'm coming up. I'll see you soon." "Are you ok?" "Do you want me to pick you up?" "Can you do me a favor?" Everything else has fallen away - our other plans that seemed so important last week - and we seem to exist only for one another. I would do anything anyone asked of me just to help out and make life easier for everyone. How amazing the power of a tragedy can change your life and remind you of what you have.

And now we are back in our own worlds doing whatever it was we were doing before. But I have to say, it feels different. Not just because I'm sad still to think of the loss. It's something else. Cousin Elaine used to word "grounded". It's true - being with family does ground you. When I'm with them I don't think about what I look like, what time it is or where else I could be. I just am and I'm happy being wherever that is. Kind of like vacation - you just exist and try to soak it all in. I do that when I am around family. So when I walked into a room of my NC friends, I feel like I came back with a more grounded version of myself. I felt more put together, confident and sure of who I am. I think that only the unconditional love of your family can put you in your place like that. Thanks, Grandma, for the reminder.

Understanding a 22 Month Old

Ahwawa - I Love You. He's nowhere near saying it right but since I know what he's trying to say I love to hear it.
Dinner - Doodoo
Lunch - Dunch
Breakfast - Bullshit. I don't know - it just comes out that way. (See the video!)
Gilk - Milk
Colcut - Chocolate
Juice - Chocolate Milk. You would think chocolate milk would be 'colcut gilk' but . . .  it's not. He says 'juice' and points to where the Nestle Quick is kept.
Wawas - Water
Bubob - Spongebob Square Pants
Mitme - Mickey Mouse
Hammy Mam - Handy Manny
Pompas - Thomas (as in the tank engine)
Tissue - This actually means tissue. But it sounds am awful lot like choo choo which means trains. If he's got boogers, he needs a tissue. Otherwise he wants to watch 'Pompas'.
Cook - He says this when he is cooking in his kitchen!
LoLo - This is what he calls his cousin, Logan. Nathan, btw, is NayNay. Nathan randomly asks for LoLo sometimes. It's adorable.
Lily - Lily is of course the other cousin. I think he really does know who Lily is but he also calls all other babies Lily, including little black babies.
Hammy - Hammer
Goggy - Doggy
Gunky - Monkey (I don't know what's up with the G's)
Baf - Bath
Teef - He wants to brush his teeth
Ticker - Sticker. What he gets when he brushes his teeth really well. This sticker thing works, btw. He actually lets me get in there and brush really well so he can pick out a 'goggy' sticker.
Wat Way - That way or This way. He likes to tell you where to go.
Moom - I think he can actually say 'moon' now but he used to say 'moom'. He is fascinated by it and looks for it every night.
Hands - He wants to wash his hands
Eyes - The sun is in his eyes
Deetz - Dance. He has a great little chicken-like dance.
Syak - Snack. He loves snacks. Especially colcut.

These are the words of Nathan at 22 months, among many others of course. Hard to imagine he will be saying lots more in full sentences very soon. He is so fun to watch. I love him!

There's Nothing Like Christmas

I never thought I would be so happy to leave December. It was a FaNtAsTiC month! But a busy one. To catch my breath is to regain sanity. All is good in the world now. And I have so many great new memories (and pictures) to look back on now that I have the time to look back. Not only were we so busy when we returned from our NY trip, but I was still overcome with the emotion of it. So many things to revel in and ponder about . . .

Like the addition of a family member. Although it wasn't Nathan's first Christmas, it was Lily's and the first Christmas that we spent it with the kiddies and the NY crowd. It was a fun as everyone says and so very special. Nothing like the first time. And there will be so many more firsts, at least in terms of more family members joining the annual festivities. New spouses and kids to look forward to. That family portrait is getting really BIG!

But I have to say there was a bittersweet tone to it all, at least in my mind. It was maybe the first time I realized that even though there will be more Christmas's, they won't always be like that. Our families will grow. People will move. Or die. Sorry, but that's life. Things will change and you never know how many more of anything you will have. I don't know why I was able to look at it from this perspective this time. And why I never saw it this way before. Aging and having kids changes things I guess. It made me sad to think that in 20 years our Kepler Family Tradition may be so very different. I just enjoy it so much that I want Nathan to   grow up with it too. I want him to be surrounded by his aunts and uncles and cousins and enjoy the same traditions we have established over the years. Hanging out, dinner, Muppet Christmas, Secret Santa, dessert. Playing in the snow if we are lucky. And more recently, having Christmas morning together for breakfast and another round of gifts.I know there will be other traditions and other people to share them with but it's this combination of people in my life that make it unique and fun. If I could, I would give Nathan lots of siblings so he could look forward to a house full of people all the time. It's when I'm happiest - when all the brothers are present. But, he will most likely NOT have 4 other siblings to enjoy.And while he will have cousins here in NC, there will still be others missing in other places like NY.

I don't want to make anyone feel bad who is not involved in this particular Christmas fun. I have an open mind and heart for new traditions to come. But what we have in NY around this time of year is very special to me in ways I may never be able to explain.

Not to get all sappy on you. Like I said, aging gives new perspectives.

Another cool part of the trip to NY was the day in the city. Greg, Danielle and I went off on our own (sans babies) to the city. The reason for it was because Greg introduced me to an amazing book that took place over a few centuries in NYC. We saw churches and streets and landmarks from the book and it was really cool to talk about it with a little more understanding of its' history. I always enjoyed NY but was overwhelmed by it. Now I have much more respect for it and want to learn more. Being able to roam around (although very cold!) was fun. And freeing!

During the trip, in addition to the regular visiting around town, we were treated to a wonderland of snow. It snowed a bunch in NC - the first time in 30 years and where are we?! But I couldn't be upset that we missed it since we got a healthy helping as well. It was awesome. Nathan had a great time and, again, having the uncles around to play with was a bonus. It made for nasty traveling for everyone once the fun was over - but still, I can't hate snow for that. It was worth it to see my little boy standing in the white stuff up to his hips!

We may be getting more of that soon - the white stuff. Though not much I'm sure. Besides, the magical part of it has past I think. It's super special over Christmas I think.

Now we are settling into new routines. MOPS starts up again next week and I enrolled Nathan and I into a fun music class that happens Fridays. Today was our first day. He wasn't super thrilled about it but we have several weeks to adjust. We have play dates to attend, parties to give and attend and other big events in the coming months. Mommy is even escaping for a night away from the family! We're looking forward to a great year. Life is good and we can't wait to see what else it brings!

Review in Pictures

We stopped in DC to visit with an old friend, Hadas!

Kickin' back with Uh Matt

Hat!

Gigi and Lily

Ghost Buster Fire House in NY near Greg's work

Trinity Church

Delicious lunch with Greg & Danielle

Sleeping Lily

Kisses with Grandpa Truck

It's all about the babies!

A Very Kepler Christmas

Aunt Jen and Little Lily

Grandpa Ed & Lily

Doot on my new best friend Bill!

The Grandmas

It's cold

Yay Uh Greg!

It's really cold. But I heart snow.

Woah. That's a lot of snow.

Not a White Christmas - but close enough!

Captured in Pictures

Every time we return from a NY trip I feel like I do the same thing - re-live every day with who, what and where. This sounds boring if you're not there. But we do so much I don't want to forget the details. So, I will try to post more pics and captions instead. Lord knows I took enough to describe every day of our lives. Oh yeah and now I have a flip (thanks Mom & Ed!) so when I figure that out it will add to the Trendowicz Experience. Enjoy!

Seasons of Change

How December is here already I don't know. The days seem to fly by. Thanksgiving included. We had a nice day with everyone here. Kokers, Powers, Gleasons and Trends. A full house and lots of full bellies.

Before I was hungry for leftovers the next day I was putting up the Christmas decorations. I love having lights and ribbons and sparkly things all around me in the house. Yes, sparkly things. It's so festive. And a lot of work. But I still wish it was more than a couple months at the end of the year that decorations are all over the place. I guess I have to work on the holidays for the rest of the year as they come starting with Valentines Day. . .

In addition to the busy holiday season making the time fly, the days are busy with the daily routines. Playtime in the morning and work time in the afternoons (for mommy) while Nathan sleeps (hopefully).Our playtime has recently gotten better since I joined a group called MOPS (Mother of PreSchoolers). They are an amazing group of ladies who have equally amazing kids! The regular MOPS meetings are every other Tuesday and then the other Tuesdays are filled in with things like playdates, outings, brunches, etc ... I look forward to it every time and feel so lucky that Nathan and I found new friends. The ones I have gotten to know all live close to our neighborhood and have similarly aged kids (so many little boys too!). It really makes everyday better when you have fun stuff to look forward to with fun people. We even had a couples night out and the guys seemed to hit off too. You never know with the men - they would rather stay home and watch TV I think. But add bowling and beer and you have their attention.

 Anyway, they way our days flow are a nice arrangement that I am enjoying while I can. Things can change so quickly with a growing, changing toddler. The next change, the big boy bed? I question it because although Nathan has proved he can climb out of his crib a couple times, he has yet to do it one his own when he should be sleeping. I think it's only a matter of time when he is desperate enough to want to get out and brave enough to explore the dark hallways. I'm pretty sure it's just around the corner. Like in the next few nights. Nathan is super great about going to be but lately not so happy about staying there after a while. Last night he fell asleep on me in the living room (after going to bed ok and then screaming only half hour after he was put down) and then he screamed and cried in the middle of the night and ended up in bed with us most of the night too. I don't know how much more sleep I can stand being without so I plan to leave him in there regardless of the screaming since I'm pretty sure it's just habit now. He know how to get what he wants. So we'll see how badly he wants to join us. To climb or not to climb . . .

As Nathan gets older (in addition to being taller and better able to climb) he is more and more aware of his surroundings and the holiday has been especially exciting. It helped that we got some real snow to get us in the spirit (2" that lasted a few days!). He had a great time playing in it even thought he wouldn't keep his hat or gloves on long. He also loves the lights, the blow up Santa and Snowmen, and trees. He's a big fan of actual Santa's as well. We went with Mom and Ed to a Christmas Concert where Santa made his appearance. It was Nathan's first in-person experience and he was in awe. He    stared and pointed and practically ran after him. Sitting ON his lap was not really his cup of tea when the time came, but seeing his face while he watched Santa from afar was magical. It makes the holidays much more fun and brings back a little something extra that you lose when you get to be an adult.

I'm excited to share the rest of the holiday traditions with Nathan with the rest of the family too.We are all looking forward to our trip to NY coming up very soon. Our Christmas Eve dinner together with all the brothers (and now the babies!) is always my favorite part. And now we do Secret Santa gifts between all the Kepler Kids. A new part of the tradition I can't wait for!

And of course I'm dying to see the Beautiful Little Lily. I'm very jealous of all the NY folk who get to see her every few days and witness the change that happens with newborns. Can't wait to snuggle with my niece.

Such a busy season. I'm so very grateful for lazy Sundays made just for baking Christmas cookies!

Halloween

My last post was super long and I didn't even get to talk about Halloween. So here it is. Nathan had a ball!

Weeks earlier, Leo and I discussed what Nathan should dress up as. We tossed around a few ideas and I went looking on-line for some ideas. By some stroke of luck I found what I needed that fit the criteria. It came in the size I needed, a character he loves and it was on a super sale. A monkey it is!

When we got the said costume I tired it right away. Nathan was not pleased with this idea. At all. I managed to snap a few shots but he was uninterested. We tried a few more times and even tried to associate candy with it. We would give him a little bucket and tell him to say "trick or treat"and he would get something yummy. He just really liked to candy part. He would get a piece then want to get the heck out of that thing and fast. Halloween was coming and I was not excited. He won't even dress up!

Halloween arrived and so did the kids. After a few visitors, Nathan was running for the door to see who was there. I think it clicked for him. Oooohhhh . . . NOW I get it! When it was time to take him out to give this trick or treating thing a try he was all over it. We put the monkey on, gave him a bucket, went across the street and collected candy for real. I had anticipated just a few minutes of resistance and then Leo and I giving up. But he was out for a solid 40 minutes or so enjoying the neighborhood festivities. Now of course he walks around saying "Trick or Treat" when he wants candy. We had to hide the candy. Toddlers really do make holidays more fun. I can't wait to see his face on Christmas!


But Thanksgiving is first. Does anyone else feel like this holiday is kinda passed over? Everyone is all about Christmas already. I can relate - I'm really excited about getting our tree up. But still, Thanksgiving is an important one I think. But then again, we should be thankful every day for what we have - not just one where we stuff ourselves with turkey! Well, I am thankful that we will have a houseful. Mom, Ed, Sharon, Stan, Kerri, Rob and Logan will be joining us next Thursday. We are looking forward to having our first holiday here in our new home (which we are also very thankful for) with our close family (and our cute little boys). Yay for the holidays!