I'm officially . . .

. . . pregnant. I know. You're thinking. "Jen, I don't know how to tell you this but you've been pregnant for almost eight months!". Well, let me tell you something. There is being pregnant and REALLY being pregnant. It's official when:
* getting ready in the morning requires you to catch your breath and rest
* you can't reach into the bottom of the hamper for the dirty clothes as well as the washer to get those damn wet clothes out
* putting on your socks takes all your mental focus
* some days you need actual assistance putting your socks on by another person
* some days you need that assistance for other articles of clothing
* you scare yourself when you see your reflection and ask "who put that fun house mirror in here?"
* you pee so often in a day you can't remember if you just went or if that was an hour ago
* even your maternity shirts are getting too short
* you're practically bent over the kitchen sink to clean dishes because you simply can't stand that close anymore
* the pen you use to update the grocery list finds a permanent new home on the floor because it's too much effort to bend down and pick it up (Leo likes this one)
* you're laptop doesn't really fit on your lap anymore
* your husband doesn't fit on his side of the bed because of the excess of pillows (I'm up to 4)
* Tums becomes as necessary as air
* your husband actually helps with chores without being asked - not because he wants to but because you are pathetic trying to do it yourself
* you sound like an old lady every time exertion of any kind is attempted - including getting up, sitting down and turning over
* your thinking slows down to the pace of growing grass in November
* you can't see the southern hemisphere of your own stomach - even in the mirror
THAT'S how I know something must be going on. Also interesting, I have been laughing a lot. Call it giddiness and excitement if you will but I think it's something else.When something makes me laugh my belly moves like I'm a fattened up Santa on Christmas Eve. Seeing myself jiggle when I giggle makes me laugh even more so I'm laughing because I look and feel ridiculous. I suppose the side effects could be worse.